Helping children cope with violent news and images

Tuesday, October 14, 2014

Thanks to today’s advanced technology, we often learn what is happening at home and abroad in real time. When the news is bad and the images are violent, it can overwhelm adults. So, it is no surprise exposure to the same can affect our children.

“Children as young as 4 years old can hear about significant crises. No matter the age of your children, it’s better that they learn about these events from you instead of the television or someone else,” said Laura Hubbs-Tait, Oklahoma State University Cooperative Extension parenting specialist.

Hubbs-Tait speaks from the perspective of both a scholar in the parenting field and a parent who has dealt with a traumatized child. Her daughter’s elementary school class saw extended television coverage of the 1995 Oklahoma City bombing. The true effect of that experience became apparent years later when her daughter was in high school during the Sept. 11, 2001, attacks.

“Only then were we aware that she had been traumatized by her exposure to the extensive media coverage in her classroom,” Hubbs-Tait said. “Our daughter recognized the connection between the events and we were able to talk about both tragedies.”

As a first step, Hubbs-Tait advised parents to reduce exposure to media, and certainly any graphic pictures, to the barest minimum, even zero, if it is possible. Once kids are exposed, though, parents have to be ready to talk about their feelings and offer realistic assurances of the family’s safety.

Begin what should be a straightforward conversation by asking your kids what they already know about the situation and follow up by encouraging them to ask any questions they have. The goal is to offer enough information so that children understand what happened, while avoiding any graphic material or images.

“Most children will have heard something, especially older children who may have access to the news and images via social media and their cell phones,” Hubbs-Tait said. “As a parent, you want to communicate to your children that it is okay to be upset by these events and that everyone supports each other.”

If your child is not coping well with exposure to tragic circumstances, signs can range from trouble sleeping to emotional problems such as sadness, depression or anxiety to physical ailments such as headaches or expressing feelings of tiredness.

Watch for behavioral changes such as acting less mature or becoming more demanding or less patient, and also be aware teens could turn to or modify their use of drugs and alcohol.

“It can be more art than science when it comes to figuring out if your child is reacting normally to an unusual event or if they are having trouble coping,” Hubbs-Tait said. “If you’re worried, reach out to your child’s pediatrician, minister, mental health provider or a counselor.”

For more information on helping children to cope with violent news and images, contact your county Extension office and visit the American Academy of Pediatrics website at www.healthychildren.org.